Last holiday,I went to Greece with my family.I went with my mum,my little sister,two of my uncles and to of my little cousins.We stayed there for one week.
Once we got there,we went to a hotel called Village Inn.Once we got there we went to the main part of the town.It was at the end of the road.We went there there to see shops.In our village,there is a swimming pool so we went to the swimming pool the next day.There was also a little park in our hotel to so we played in the park.After a while,we went to eat food at the end of the road.We went to a shop where you can go on a speed boat go to a beach go to a water park and you could drive your own speed boat.We booked all of them.After we booked the trips,we went back to the hotel.
The next day,we went on a coach to take us to go get to the boats and we took the boat to get to the beach.The beach was beautiful.We stayed there for quite a while.There was a ship that was on the beach that was wrecked,however you can still climb it.It was quite hard to climb but eventually got to the top of the ship.After we climbed on the ship we had to get down because our boat was waiting for us we almost got left at the beach!We took the boat to get to the coach and the coach took us home.
The next day,we went to hire a speed boat.We took a taxi to get there.
June 13, 2016 at 4:50 pm
Donte,
I would like you to re-read this and look carefully at how often you have repeated yourself.
Did you write a plan?
How might you avoid repetition?